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Dick Jokes

DJoke400X311

The Dick Joke
High art... from a low place.

Giddy up!

Hits: 4290

What's the worst thing about anal sex with a horse?

When it's his turn.

What's For Dinner?

Hits: 2813

Why'd the bride slide down the bannister on her honeymoon?

To warm up her husband's dinner.

Hold On There Little Fella

Hits: 2999

A midget whips out his two-foot dick.

The whore he's with says, "Oh, no, you ain't putting that thing in me. I'll kiss it."

"Fuck you" he tells her. "I can do that myself."

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

Better Than Nothing

Why is sex with your spouse like a convenience store?

There's not much variety, but what else is open at three in the morning.

Grandma Is Rockin' The Boat

I asked my grandma if she had ever tried 69.

She said, "No, but I have done 53 -- that's all the sailors I could screw in one night."

Drop The Coin Right Into The Slot

A couple is in divorce court to decide on custody of their child. The judge asks each one to give a reason why they should be the one to keep the child.

The wife says, "Well I carried this child around in me for nine months and I had to go through a painful birth process. This is my child and a part of me." Then the judge turns to the husband and asks the same question.

The husband replies, "OK, I take a coin and put it in the drink machine and a drink comes out. Now, tell me, who does the drink belong to -- me or the machine"