A laugh a day. It's not hard. Seriously.

twitter facebook youtube 27330664 ml50x52

Dick's Joke of the Day

All Roads Lead to the Bar

A Roman walks into a bar, holds up two fingers, and says, “Five beers, please”.

Liqour In The Front

What do you call two lesbians in a closet?

A liqour cabinet.

New Train Set For Christmas

Why are a woman's breasts like a Xmas train set?

Originally made for kids but dad wants to play with them.

I'd Like To Point This Out

My wife came in complaining about me never lifting a finger around the house.

So I did - the middle one.

And that's when the fight started...

Don't Miss These Jokes!

A Natural Reaction

A wife went to see a therapist. "I've got a big problem. Every time we're in bed and my husband climaxes he lets out this ear splitting yell."

"My dear," the shrink said, "that's completely normal. I don't see what the problem is."

"The problem is," she complained, "It wakes me up!"

On The Night Beat

A cop pulls a guy over one night for swerving in and out of lanes on the highway. He tells the guy to blow into a breathalyzer. "I can't do that, officer, I'm an asthmatic. I could get an asthma attack if I blow into that tube."

"OK, we'll just get a urine sample down at the station." "Can't do that either, officer. I'm a diabetic. I could get low blood sugar if I pee in a cup."

"Alright, we'll take a blood sample." "Can't do that either, officer. I'm a hemophiliac. If I give blood, I could die."

"Fine then, just walk this white line." "Can't do that either, officer." "Why not?"

"Because I'm drunk."

One Difference Between Men And Women

My wife and I were discussing the differences between men and women. She asked: "So what do you think the biggest difference is?"

I told her: "What comes to mind when I say I'd like to give you a facial!"

And that's when the fight started...