DJ of the Day

Just booked a table for me and the wife for Valentine's Day.

Hope the bitch knows how to play snooker.

A blonde walks up to a guy in a blue bathing suit and says, "Did you know your eyes match your swim trunks?"

He says, "Why? Are my eyes bulging?"

What'd the blonde say when she saw a guy walking two dogs?

"He must be really blind."

My wife and I were discussing the current state of NASA and the space program. She asked: "Why do you think they never sent a woman to the moon?"

I told her: "'Cause it doesn't need cleaning."

And that's when the fight started...

My wife wanted to test me. So she asked: "Honey, what would you do if you came home and caught me in bed with another guy."

I told her: "I'd kick his seeing eye dog."

And that's when the fight started...

You know why men ask for a woman's hand in marriage?

Because they are tired of using their own.

The difference between a slut & a bitch? A slut will screw anyone. A bitch will screw anyone but you.

Dick's Joke of the Day