A farmer bursts into the bedroom with his wife in bed and a sheep under his arm. He yells, "This is the pig I fuck when you have a headache!" The wife looks up and says, "That's not pig dumbass, it's a sheep!"
The farmer looks over and shouts: "Quiet! I wasn't talking to you!"
And that's when the fight started...
What's the difference between a blonde and a mosquito?
A mosquito stops sucking after you slap it.
Keep this in mind... a honeymoon should only be for six days. Why? Because seven days make a whole week.
In fact, don't go on your honeymoon for longer than 5 days, or you will get a weak end.
Just sayin'...
My wife stripped naked last night and stood on her head. I asked: "What the hell are you doing?"
She said: "Well... if you can't get it up again tonight, I thought maybe you could just drop it in!"
And that's when the fight started...