What's the recipe for a Honeymoon Salad?
Lettuce alone with no dressing.
Why shouldn't you cut suppositories in half?
They're supposed to be shoved up your ass whole.
Wife comes out of a beauty salon and asks husband: "So, how do I look?"
"Well, at least you tried..."
And that's when the fight started...
A guy goes up to a girl in a bar and says, "You want to play 'Magic'?"
She says, "What's that?"
He says, "We go to my house and fuck, and then you disappear."