WTF?!

WTF?!

Sometimes life can be stranger than even some of our very own dick jokes. And in times like that all we can say is: "What the fuck?!" All these stories are true... they happened to real people. And we didn't even change the names. They deserve the recognition!

: Created: 25 June 2015; Hits: 3826

#WTF?! A woman admitted to taking selfies as she had sex with her pit bull at her grandmother’s house, police said. Here we go again... Another doggie style story with a million possibilities for jokes that tell themselves.

: Created: 10 May 2015; Hits: 3736

#WTF?! Shades of Lorena Bobbitt! Trying to slice his salami was truly the most unkindest cut of all. A woman pleaded guilty to assault with a deadly weapon and assault with great bodily injury after her husband said she attempted to cut off his penis with a pair of scissors.

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

Sure Is Dark In Here

A man is having sex with a married woman when her husband comes home from work early. The man runs into the closet where he hears a little voice, "Sure is dark in here."

The man startled can only think to say, "Yes it is."

The boy's voice then says, "Wanna buy this baseball for $50?"

The man replies, "What? That's outrageous."

The boy says, "Or I can just show you my dad's shotgun."

To keep him quiet the man says: "Okay kid, here you go," as he hands the kid the money.

The next week the man is again making love to the same married woman and again her husband comes home early sending him to the closet. And the next thing he hears is the boy's voice, "It sure is dark in here... how about $1000 for the glove."

The man frustrated replies, "What?! That is completely ridiculous."

"Would you rather see the shotgun?" threatens the young man.

So the guy forks over the grand and takes the glove.

The next day the boy is complaining to his father that he sold his glove and ball and has nothing to play with. The father asked him, "What? How much you get?"

The boy replies, "$1050."

The father says, "You shouldn't take advantage of your friends like that! I'm taking you to church right now to confess."

At church the boy gets into the confessional box and says, "It sure is dark in here."

The priest says, "Don't start this shit again!"

Was Never So Good At Math...

Did you hear about the constipated mathematician?

He worked it out with a pencil.

(uhhhh....Yeah, I have the same feeling you are having! :-O)

Always Important To Match

A blonde walks up to a guy in a blue bathing suit and says, "Did you know your eyes match your swim trunks?"

He says, "Why? Are my eyes bulging?"