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WTF?!

WTF?!

Sometimes life can be stranger than even some of our very own dick jokes. And in times like that all we can say is: "What the fuck?!" All these stories are true... they happened to real people. And we didn't even change the names. They deserve the recognition!

Medics Rush To Help 'Collapsed' Woman Who Turns Out To Be Pigeon

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#WTF?! Medical workers rushed to the aid of what they thought was a collapsed woman. Nope. Turned out to be a pigeon.

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Ohio Man Tried To Have Sex With A Red Van

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#WTF?! Just when you think you have seen it all, a guy allegedly tries to fornicate with a red van. One Tuesday evening, cops in Dayton, Ohio received a 911 call about a man "pulling his pants down and swinging on a stop sign," according to a Dayton Police Department report. Nothing like a big swingin' dick to make a cop's night!

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

It's Obvious When You Think About It

What do you call a rabbit with no feet?

Unlucky.

A Better Approach

Two drunks are about to leave the bar at closing time when one says: "Man I hate getting home at this hour. All I want to do is crawl into bed and crash. But the old lady is waitin' up and won't stop raggin' on me for stayin' out late and comin' home drunk."

His friend tells him: "I found the perfect solution. Instead of tryin' to sneak in I slam the front door and scream out 'Wake up honey I wanna fuck!' When I do that she always pretends to be asleep!"

No Rest For This Piece

A guy walks into a whorehouse looking for some action. He goes up to the madame and asks,"Hey, can I get a piece from one of your fine ladies?"

"Sorry sir," the madame responds, "but, we're all full." "Aw, please." he begs, "I'm super horny and I really need some poontang!"

The madame thinks for a moment then answers, "Well, there is one girl left but when you go meet her you have to wear this black condom." "Whatever," the guy shrugs and runs upstairs.

A few hours later he comes back down and says, "Wow, that was great. She didn't even make any noise. But why did I have to wear the black condom?"

The madame answered, "Out of respect for the dead."