Why'd the bride slide down the bannister on her honeymoon?
To warm up her husband's dinner.
A man goes to a $10 hooker and gets the crabs.
When he goes back to complain, the hooker laughs and says, "What do you expect for $10 -- lobster?"
A new bride was embarrassed to be on her honeymoon. When she and her husband pulled up to the hotel, she asked him if there was any way that they could make it appear as if they had been married a long time.
He responded, "Sure. You carry the luggage!"
And that's when the fight started...
What's even better than winning a gold medal at the Special Olympics?
Not being a retard.
