Dick Jokes

DJoke400X311

The Dick Joke

High art... from a low place.

What's the recipe for a Honeymoon Salad?

Lettuce alone with no dressing.

Which is the odd one out a woman, a microwave or a freezer?

The microwave, the other two leak when they're fucked!

Who's the world's greatest athlete?

The guy who finishes first and third in a masturbation contest.

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What do you call a woman who can suck a lemon through a 40-foot garden hose.

Darling.

Gallery owner: "Guy came in bought all your paintings."

Artist: "Great."

"Not really, he was your doctor."

A bum walks up to a well-dressed woman shopping on Rodeo Drive and says: "I haven't eaten anything in four days!"

She looks back at him and says: "God I wish I had your will power."

Toss My Honeymoon Salad