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Dick Jokes

DJoke400X311

The Dick Joke
High art... from a low place.

You Know You've Done It

Hits: 1889

Women are like parking spots. With all the good ones taken & nobody looking, you stick it in a disabled one.

Correct Dosage

Hits: 3141

Why shouldn't you cut suppositories in half?

They're supposed to be shoved up your ass whole.

No Tricks Here

Hits: 1960

What's a sure-fire way to give a woman an orgasm?

Who cares?

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The Doctor Was A Big Help

My buddy was jerking off way too much, so he went to a shrink. Good move. So far he's been able to control his compulsive masturbating. Now he doesn't jerk off nearly as much. He says it feels like he got a huge load off his chest.

You Make The Call

Man talks dirty to a woman? That's sexual harassment.

Woman talks dirty to a man? That's $1.99 a minute.

So That's How It Happened

I told my wife: You know the trouble with most women? They get all excited over nothing!"

She said: "Yeah, I know what you mean, I married him."

And that's when the fight started...