Just Plain Funny

PlainFunny400X200 Not every laugh has to be a dick joke!

Why is a pap smear called a pap smear?

Because women wouldn't do them if they were called cunt scrapes.

How do you get four old ladies to shout "Fuck"?

Get a fifth old lady to shout "Bingo!"

Why does it take longer to build a blonde snowman?

Because you have to hollow out the head.

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Susie is 16. She comes home at 2 in the morning, with her mom waiting up mad as hell.

She says "Mom, I was with Johnny, I love him." Her mother says, "It's not love, it's infatuation."

Susie says, "But I blew him and then he fucked me in the ass."

Her mother says, "That's infatuation. When he fucks you in the ass and then you blow him... that's love."

I razzed my wife: "I shoulda never got married. Why buy the whole cow when I was gettin' the milk for free?"

She snapped back: "Yeah? Well I got stuck with the whole pig for just one little sausage."

And that's when the fight started...

A lady goes golfing and gets hit in the ass really hard with a golf ball. She goes to the doctor.

The doctor says, "Where were you hit?" She says, "Between the first and the second hole."

He says, "That doesn't leave alot of room for a band-aid, does it?"

Depends On What You Call It