A laugh a day. It's not hard. Seriously.

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Just Plain Funny

PlainFunny400X200Not every laugh has to be a dick joke!

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What do you call a man who lost all his intelligence?

A widower.

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The bride, upon her engagement, went to her mother and said, "I've found a man just like father!"

Her mother replied, "So what do you want from me, sympathy?"

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Peace comes at a price. If the whole world smoked a joint at the same time, there would be world peace for at least two hours. Followed by a global food shortage.

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Men are Dogs, Not Vice Versa

Why does a dog lick himself?

He can't make a fist.

From Father To Son

A boy goes to the drug store with his dad and sees the condom display. The boy asks: "Dad, why do they make packs of just one condom?" Dad says: "Those are for the high-schoolers for Friday nights."

Then the boy asls: "So, why do they make packs of three?" And dad says: "Those are for the college guys for Friday, Saturday and Sunday nights."

Finally the boy asks: "Then why do they make packs of 12?" And dad tells him: "Those are for married couples -- you know, January, February, March..."

Hang On Tight

Little Johnny was passing his parents bedroom in the middle of the night in search of a glass of water. Hearing a lot of moaning and thumping, he peaks in and catches mommy and daddy in the act. Before daddy can even react, Little Johnny exclaims, "Oh boy! Horsey ride! Daddy, can I ride your back?"

Daddy, relieved that Johnny's not asking more uncomfortable questions, and seeing the opportunity not to break his stride, agrees...

Johnny hops on daddy and daddy gets back to businessn... pretty soon mommy starts moaning and gasping... Johnny cries out, "Hang on tight, Daddy! This is the part where me and the mailman usually get bucked off."