A laugh a day. It's not hard. Seriously.

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Just Plain Funny

PlainFunny400X200Not every laugh has to be a dick joke!

It's 11 pm...

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What do you call a man who lost all his intelligence?

A widower.

Just Like Your Father

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The bride, upon her engagement, went to her mother and said, "I've found a man just like father!"

Her mother replied, "So what do you want from me, sympathy?"

Can't We All Just Get Along?

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Peace comes at a price. If the whole world smoked a joint at the same time, there would be world peace for at least two hours. Followed by a global food shortage.

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

On The Parade Route

Two women are stuck on one side of the boulevard as a parade passes through... complete with floats, a marching band, and hot air balloons.

One gal asks the other: "What's this all about?" Her friend tells her: "It's the gay pride parade."

The first gal replies: "Yeah. Well I suck dick and take it up the ass. Where's my fuckin' parade?"

It's All How You Look At It

A married couple goes to the same Italian restaurant every Sunday for 30 years. And every time they show up the owner says, "Hey! Its-a you two guys. You my favorite-a couple. You made-a for each other. You last-a so long. You meant-a to be!"

Then one Sunday the guy walks in alone. The owner says, "Whats-a happened?" The guy tells him, "We got a divorce."

The Italian guy says, "Oh, you much-a better off-a now."

Picture Perfect

I thought I could please my wife by offering her a sumptuous breakfast in bed. So I asked her what would be her perfect breakfast.

She said: "My perfect breakfast would be a cup of gourmet coffee. Our son is on the cover of the Wheaties box. Our daughter is on the cover of Business Week. And your face is on the back of the milk carton."

And that's when the fight started...