A laugh a day. It's not hard. Seriously.

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Every Frickin' Joke

Category: Dick Jokes
Hits: 2228

I used to get a hard-on just watching my wife eat a banana.

Now I only get a hard-on if she's choking on it.

Category: Just Plain Funny
Hits: 2270

How do men sort out their laundry?

Filthy, and filthy but wearable.

Category: Just Plain Funny
Hits: 2541

Barking dog at the back door wanting in and your wife's yelling at the front wanting in. Which one do you let in?

The dog, once he's in, he shuts up!

Category: Dick Jokes
Hits: 2228

What did the fresh egg say to the boiling water when the farmer's wife dropped it in?

Don't expect me to get hard so fast... I just got laid by some chick a minute ago.

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

One Way To Drive Home The Point

A guy gets on a bus sits down next to a very attractive nun. Totally enamored he boldly asks if he can have sex with her. Naturally the nun says no and gets off at the next stop. The guy goes to the bus driver and asks him if he knows of any way he might be able to have sex with the nun.

"Well," says the bus driver, "every night at 8 o'clock, she goes to the cemetery to pray. If you dress up as God, I'm sure you could convince her to have sex with you."

So the guy figures he would give it a try. He dresses up in his best God costume and hides out in the cemetery. At eight he sees the nun arrive. Just as she starts to pray he jumps out to confront her as God.

"Oh, God!" she exclaims. "Take me with you!" The guy tells her she must first have sex with him to prove her faith. The nun says yes, but tells him she prefers anal sex. Before you know it, they're getting down to it, as he ravages her from behind. When it's over, the guy suddenly pulls off his God disguise and shouts: "Haha! I'm the man from the bus!"

"Haha!" the nun says back to him while pulling her costume off, "I'm the bus driver!"

I'm Too Old For This

How do you know when you are getting old?

When you start having dry dreams and wet farts.

Who Took My Pen!

A nurse walks in and says, "Doc, what are you doing?"

He says, "I'm writing a prescription."

She says, "But you're holding your thermometer."

He says, "Jesus Christ, some asshole has my pen."