A laugh a day. It's not hard. Seriously.

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Just Plain Funny

PlainFunny400X200Not every laugh has to be a dick joke!

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My wife's losing weight now thanks to a weight loss club. She goes near the fridge, I hit her with the club.

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What is the difference between a bachelor and a married man?

Bachelor comes home, sees what's in the refrigerator, goes to bed. Married man comes home, sees what's in the bed, and goes to the refrigerator.

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Cross Raggedy Ann with the Pillsbury Dough Boy what do you get?

A red headed bitch with a yeast infection.

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

We Don't Sell To Your Type

A blonde walks up to a salesman and says, "I want to buy this TV."

He says, "Sorry, we don't sell to blondes."

She goes for a complete make-over...she gets a haircut and new hair color, a new outfit, and puts on big sunglasses. She waits a few days and then she walks up to the salesman and says, "I want to buy this TV."

He says, "Sorry, we don't sell to blondes."

She says., "How do you know I'm a blonde?"

He says, "Because that's a microwave."

 

Quick Thinking

Little Johnny's dad was sitting on the edge of the bed rolling on a condom about to give some to the old lady. Little Johnny sticks his head in the door, sees his dad and says, "Whatcha doin' Daddy?" Johnny's dad stoops over to cover up his dick and starts looking around at the floor. "Oh, I'm just looking for this big rat I saw." he tells the kid.

Little Johnny asks, "Whatcha gonna do, fuck it?"

A Good Choir Boy

What is the difference between acne and a catholic priest?

Acne usually comes on a boy's face after he turns 12.