I have a a real problem with sex and booze...
Every time I have sex, my girlfriend boos.
What'd the Polish guy say when he came home and found his best friend on top of his wife?
Down, Fido, down boy!
Two gay guys live together. The first guy says, "Let's play hide and seek. I'll hide, and if you can find me, I'll blow you."
The second guy asks, "What if I can't find you?"
His roomy tells him, "I'll be behind the piano."
How did Pinocchio find out he was made out of wood?
His hand caught fire.
