Just Plain Funny

PlainFunny400X200 Not every laugh has to be a dick joke!

I quit my job at the helium gas factory.

I refuse to be spoken to in that tone of voice.

We named our daughter after my wife's mother.

Passive Aggressive Psycho turns 5 next week.

I've got a new hobby -- collecting empty bottles.

Sounds a lot better than "I'm an alcoholic."

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What's the difference between light and hard?

You can fall asleep with a light on.

Working in the garage this morning my wife barges in nagging about not showing her any respect. She demands I recognize her life has value too.

So I pick her up, give her a big hug and dump her in the recycle bin.

And that's when the fight started...

Want to see flying saucers?

Head over to the all-night diner and grab the waitress by the ass.

Hate To Cop An Attitude, But...