I quit my job at the helium gas factory.
I refuse to be spoken to in that tone of voice.
A wife tells her husband: "I have good news & bad news." The husband says: "Just give me the good news."
The wife: "The paperboy isn't sterile."
What do a nearsighted gynecologist and a puppy have in common?
A wet nose.
The phone rings and Mrs. Johnson answers. A voice breathing heavily on the other end says, "I bet you have a tight asshole with no hair."
She replies, "Yeah, he's watching TV. Who should I say is calling?"
