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Every Frickin' Joke

Category: And that's when the fight started...
Hits: 1881

My wife stripped naked last night and stood on her head. I asked: "What the hell are you doing?"

She said: "Well... if you can't get it up again tonight, I thought maybe you could just drop it in!"

And that's when the fight started...

Category: Dick Jokes
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What's the definition of a lady?

Someone who doesn't drink or smoke, and the only time she curses is when your dick slips out.

Category: Dick Jokes
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Why can't Barbie get pregnant?

Because Ken comes in a different box.

Category: Dick Jokes
Hits: 2388

What's the difference between your job and a whore who dropped dead?

Tomorrow your job will still suck!

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

New Business

Here at Dick Joke of the Day we are thinking about selling our own brand of T-Shirts.

They'll read: "LIFE'S A DICK. WHEN IT GETS HARD, FUCK IT!"

Can't Teach An Old Dog New Tricks

Two guys are having a couple of beers and talking about their wives. "Do you and your wife ever do it doggy style?" asks the first one.

"Well, not exactly," replies his friend. "She just pretends to be a dog." "Very kinky." says the first guy.

"Well, not really... Whenever I lean over and whisper let's do it doggy style, she rolls over and plays dead."

Up And Down

One night a little girl walks in on her parents having sex. The mother is going up and down on the father and when she sees her daughter looking at them she immediately stops. “What are you doing, Mommy?” The mother, too embarassed to tell her little girl about sex, makes up an answer. “Well, sweetie, sometimes daddy’s tummy gets too big so I have to jump up and down on it to flatten it out.”

The little girl looks at mom and says, “Well, mommy you're really wasting your time.” The mother is confused so she asks, “Why do you say that sweetheart?”

The little girl answers, “Because mommy, when you leave for work in the morning, the lady next door comes over and blows it back up.”