Every Frickin' Joke - Results from #688

Do You Have Cats At Home?

: Category: Just Plain Funny; Published: 15 November 2015; Hits: 2529

What's white, smells, and is found in panties?

Clitty litter.

(Yes, in my old age my jokes just get worse and worse. Take it, or leave it!)

Depends On What You Call It

: Category: Just Plain Funny; Published: 14 November 2015; Hits: 2237

Why is a pap smear called a pap smear?

Because women wouldn't do them if they were called cunt scrapes.

Another Bingo!

: Category: Just Plain Funny; Published: 13 November 2015; Hits: 3057

How do you get four old ladies to shout "Fuck"?

Get a fifth old lady to shout "Bingo!"

Why So Sad?

: Category: Dick Jokes; Published: 12 November 2015; Hits: 2607

Why do women wear black underwear?

They're in mourning for the stiff they buried the night before.

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Perfecta

A guy is reading his paper when his wife walks up behind him and smacks him on the back of the head with a frying pan. He says, "What was that for?"

She says, "I found a piece of paper in your pocket with 'Betty Sue' written on it." He says, "Jesus, honey...remember last week when I went to the track? 'Betty Sue' was the name of the horse I went there to bet on."

She shrugs and walks away. Three days later he's reading his paper when she walks up behind him and smacks him on the back of the head with the frying pan again.

He says, "What was that for?" She says, "Your horse called."

Correct Dosage

Why shouldn't you cut suppositories in half?

They're supposed to be shoved up your ass whole.

Location, Location, Location

Teenage daughter after a movie: "Had to change my seat 3 times."

Mom: "Did someone harass you?"

"Finally!"