A laugh a day. It's not hard. Seriously.

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Every Frickin' Joke

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What do you call a guy who expects to get laid on the second date?

Slow.

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1/3 of women not interested in sex. Me too. The 1/3 from the neck up...meh. From the tits down? I'm in.

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Judge Calloway's court docket was too full.
 
So he knocked the sodomy charge down to "following too close."

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My wife cheats when we play board games. Last night I'm playing Monopoly with the kids and she was in the garage bangin' the landscaper.

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

Turnabout is Fair Play

Three blonde men are stranded on one side of a wide river, and don't know how to get across.

The first man prays to God to make him smart enough to figure out how to cross the river. So God turns him into a brown-haired man and he swims across.

The second man prays to God to make him even smarter. So God turns him into a dark-haired man and he builds a boat and rows across.

Then the third man prays to God to make him the smartest of all. So God turns him into a woman and she walks across the bridge.

Tough Times Call For One Thing...

My wife was concerned that we weren't managing the household well in tough financial times. So she asked me to take some action and plan for the future.

No problem I told her. I ran out and came home with 2 cases of beer instead of one.

And that's when the fight started...

Now That'll Make Her Scream!

How do you make your wife scream for an hour after sex?

Wipe your dick on the curtains.