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Dick Jokes

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The Dick Joke
High art... from a low place.

Not Quite Like Yeezys

Hits: 4176

Did you hear they came out with a new lesbian shoe?

They're called Dikes. They have an extra long tongue and only take one finger to get off!

Not Necessarily From The Bronx

Hits: 2687

What's the definition of a Yankee?

Same thing as a quickie only you do it yourself.

Maybe He Should Go To a Sperm Bank?

Hits: 3341

How does a guy know if he has a high sperm count?

If the girl has to chew, before she swallows.

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

A New Accessory

My son gets behind the wheel of the car to take his first driving lesson. As mom gets in the passenger side he rolls down the window and asks: "Does this car have passenger side air bags?"

I said, "It does now."

And that's when the fight started...

Do You Not Have Any Shame?

So I went to the doctor for a physical and he told me I should stop jerking off. I asked him why should I stop?

He told me: "Because you're at a physical."

The Long And The Short Of It

Three guys are arguing about who has the longest dick, and they decide the only way to find out once and for all is to go to the Observation Deck of the Empire State Building and hang them over the side.

The first guy says, "Check it out. My pecker reaches down to the 68th floor." The second guy says, "That's nothing. This beauty's dangling down past the 34th floor."

They look over and see the third guy jumping up and down and back and forth. The first guy yells at him, "What the hell are you doing?" He says, "Dodgin' traffic."