Dick Jokes

DJoke400X311

The Dick Joke

High art... from a low place.

Did you hear they came out with a new lesbian shoe?

They're called Dikes. They have an extra long tongue and only take one finger to get off!

What's the definition of a Yankee?

Same thing as a quickie only you do it yourself.

How does a guy know if he has a high sperm count?

If the girl has to chew, before she swallows.

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What does it mean when your wife is lying in bed gasping for breath and calling your name?

You didn't hold the pillow down long enough.

Teacher to the class: "Who can use the word 'definitely' in a sentence?"

So Little Johnny raises his hand: "Teacher, do farts have lumps in them?"

The Teacher said looked puzzled but answered: "Of course not Johnny."

To which Little Johnny answered: "Then I have definitely crapped my pants."

"IT'S A BOY" I shouted "A BOY, I DON'T BELIEVE IT, IT'S A BOY."

And with tears streaming down my face I swore I'd never visit another Thai Brothel again!

Not Quite Like Yeezys