Dick Jokes

DJoke400X311

The Dick Joke

High art... from a low place.

Did you hear they came out with a new lesbian shoe?

They're called Dikes. They have an extra long tongue and only take one finger to get off!

What's the definition of a Yankee?

Same thing as a quickie only you do it yourself.

How does a guy know if he has a high sperm count?

If the girl has to chew, before she swallows.

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What do you call a guy who expects to get laid on the second date?

Slow.

Last year, I bought my mother-in-law a cemetery plot as a Christmas gift.

This year I didn't buy her anything..

When my wife asked me why I didn't buy her mother a gift this year I told her "Hey, she never used the gift I bought her last year!"

And that's when the fight started...

A man tells his wife "I want to take a picture of your boobs so I can remember them like this forever."

The wife replies "I want to take a picture of your dick so I can enlarge it."

And that's when the fight started...

Not Quite Like Yeezys