Women Are Emotional

My wife told me I should be more affectionate.

So I told her I got a girlfriend.

And that's when the fight started...

What's the job application at Hooters?

They just hand you a bra and say: "Here, fill this out."

Who is the most popular guy at a nudist colony? The guy who can carry 2 cups of coffee and a dozen donuts.

Who is the most popular girl at a nudist colony? The girl who can eat the last donut.

Two women are stuck on one side of the boulevard as a parade passes through... complete with floats, a marching band, and hot air balloons.

One gal asks the other: "What's this all about?" Her friend tells her: "It's the gay pride parade."

The first gal replies: "Yeah. Well I suck dick and take it up the ass. Where's my fuckin' parade?"