Get Back In The Kitchen!

My wife asked me to get her a watch for her birthday.

I told her, "What for...there's a clock on the stove!"

And that's when the fight started...

You know, it's not every day my wife says, "Sweetheart, why don't you take me upstairs, fuck me in the ass and cum all over my face."

Today was no exception.

A man tells his wife "I want to take a picture of your boobs so I can remember them like this forever."

The wife replies "I want to take a picture of your dick so I can enlarge it."

And that's when the fight started...

Two little old ladies were at the slots in Atlantic City. One asks: "So... did you come on the bus?"

Her friend replied: "Yeah, but I made it look like an asthma attack."