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PlainFunny400X200Not every laugh has to be a dick joke!

Baby Polar Bear

Created: 31 October 2014
Hits: 2918

A baby polar bear goes to his mama and asks: "Am I a real polar bear?"

His mama assures him: "Of course you are. You're my son and we live in the north pole."

Then the baby bear goes to his father and asks: "Dad, am I a real polar bear?"

His dad tells him: "Yes you are son. You have big paws and you're white just like me. Why do you ask?"

"Cause I'm fuckin' freezing."

Paralysis Comes Easy

Created: 29 October 2014
Hits: 2714

How do you paralyze a woman from the waist down?

Marry her.

Adoption Laws

Created: 26 October 2014
Hits: 2522

Why can't lesbians adopt a child?

Because they don't serve minors to lickers.

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

I Know Her By Reputation

How do you know who gives a good blow job?

Word of mouth.

First Door On The Left

A dog walks into a bar and hops up on a stool. He looks the bartender in the eye and says, "Hey, guess what? I can talk. Have you ever seen a talking dog before? How about a drink?"

The bartender thinks for a moment and says, "Sure, the toilet's right around the corner."

No Prescription Necessary

A lady walked into a pharmacy and asked: "Do you have Viagra?" The pharmacist answered: "Sure." She then asked: "Does it work?" and his reply was: "Definitely!"

Finally whe wanted to know: "Can you get it over the counter?" and he told her "I can if I take two!"

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