A laugh a day. It's not hard. Seriously.

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Just Plain Funny

PlainFunny400X200Not every laugh has to be a dick joke!

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Why won't cannibals eat divorced women?

They're too bitter.

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World population has become a big problem. Experts say every 4 seconds a woman gives birth to another baby.

Our problem? We have to find this woman and stop her.

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What's worse than getting your keys stuck inside your car when you're parked outside an abortion clinic?

Going in to ask if you can borrow a coat hanger.

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

Until I Met A Boy Who Had No Hands

What did the boy with no hands get for Christmas?

Gloves! 

Just kidding, I don't know what he got, he hasn't opened it yet.

How Much Land Do You Own?

Three Texans are sitting on a bench together. One named Smith, one named Johnson, and the other one named Goldberg. Smith begins to brag about how much land he has, "500 acres with 1000 head of cattle I call it 'Smith Acres'"

Johnson says, "Yeah, not bad, but I have 1000 acres and 2000 head of cattle, I call it 'Johnson Estates'". Both Smith and Johnson look over at Goldberg and say, "So, how much land do you have?"

Goldberg says, "Well, I only have 75 acres." "75 acres!?!" they reply, "that's all? What that's called?"

Goldberg responds, "Downtown Houston".

Leaves A Bad Taste In Your Mouth

You know why you should never drink diet soda during oral sex?

Because that way you'll have two after-tastes to get rid of.