One day the boss calls in the vice-president. "We're downsizing. We have to lay off either Jack or Barbara."
The VP tells him, "Barbara is my best worker, but Jack has a wife and three kids. I'm not sure what to do."
The next morning the VP is waiting and Barbara is the first to arrive. He tells her, "Barbara, I've got a problem. I've got to lay you or Jack off and I don't know what to do?"
Barbara quickly responds, "You'd better jack off. I've got a headache."
Three blonde men are stranded on one side of a wide river, and don't know how to get across.
The first man prays to God to make him smart enough to figure out how to cross the river. So God turns him into a brown-haired man and he swims across.
The second man prays to God to make him even smarter. So God turns him into a dark-haired man and he builds a boat and rows across.
Then the third man prays to God to make him the smartest of all. So God turns him into a woman and she walks across the bridge.
