Wife: "Will you love me when I'm old and fat?"
Husband: "I do."
And that's when the fight started...
My son gets behind the wheel of the car to take his first driving lesson. As mom gets in the passenger side he rolls down the window and asks: "Does this car have passenger side air bags?"
I said, "It does now."
Why is psychoanalysis faster for men than women?
When he has to go back to his childhood he's already there.
Husband: "What would you like for your anniversary, Sylvia?"
Wife: "A divorce, Bernie."
Husband: "I wasn't planning on spending that much."
