It's Been Said

It's been said if you bend over & put your ear to someone's leg you can hear "What the fuck are you doing?"

It's called St. Valentine's Day because "St. Blowjob for Jewelry Day" just didn't have the same ring to it.

What two things can get a woman pregnant when they're in the air?

Her feet.

What do you do if your girlfriend starts smoking?

Slow down and use some lubricant.