If a guy and a girl need a marriage license what do lesbians need?
A liquor license.
Sally: "Let's play house."
Little Johnny: "What do I do?"
Sally: "Communicate your feelings."
Johnny: "How do I do that?"
Sally: "Perfect. You can be the husband!"
The phone rings and Mrs. Johnson answers. A voice breathing heavily on the other end says, "I bet you have a tight asshole with no hair."
She replies, "Yeah, he's watching TV. Who should I say is calling?"
What's a man's idea of a balanced diet?
A beer in each hand.
