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The Dick Joke
High art... from a low place.

Time For A Quickie

Created: 29 January 2015
Hits: 2963

A man walks into the kitchen and finds his wife boiling eggs. She looks at him passionately, lays on the counter, and says, "Make love to me Randy!"

Not wanting to lose the chance he embraces her quickly and they make passionate love.

When they are finished he asks her, "What was that about?"

She replies, "The egg timer was broken."

Sounds Like Spring Break

Created: 27 January 2015
Hits: 2993

A brunette tells her blonde sister "Last night I slept with a Brazilian."

The blonde sister replies "I thought I was the slut! How many is a Brazilian?"

Forgive Me For I Have Sinned

Created: 22 January 2015
Hits: 3053

A 100-year-old man enters a Catholic confessional and admits "Father, last night I had sex with a couple of 18-year-old girls and it lasted for hours."

The priest sternly replies "That is a sin, I'm going to give you a penance."

The old man laughs "That won't be necessary father, I'm Jewish."

The father, confused, asks "Why are you telling me this?"

"I'm telling everyone!"

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

Correct Dosage

Why shouldn't you cut suppositories in half?

They're supposed to be shoved up your ass whole.

Most Men Talk A Lot Of Sh*t!

Why do men whistle when they are sitting on the toilet?

It helps them remember which end to wipe...

Why Santa Doesn't Have Children

Why doesn't Santa have any children?

Because he only comes once a year, and when he does, it's down the chimney.

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