What do you do if your girlfriend starts smoking?
Slow down and use some lubricant.
Can't wait to go to the convention for women with no legs. I heard the place was crawling with pussy!
How do you get a lawyer out of a tree?
Cut the rope.
A guy wanted to have sex with his wife. So he gave her a wink and popped a Viagra.
His wife looked at him and said: "You know why Viagra is just like Disneyland? They both make you wait an hour for a two minute ride!"
And that's when the fight started...
