What's the difference between pink and purple?
The grip!
What did the fresh egg say to the boiling water when the farmer's wife dropped it in?
Don't expect me to get hard so fast... I just got laid by some chick a minute ago.
I razzed my wife: "I shoulda never got married. Why buy the whole cow when I was gettin' the milk for free?"
She snapped back: "Yeah? Well I got stuck with the whole pig for just one little sausage."
And that's when the fight started...
Any man who thinks baseball is our national pastime never played doctor when he was a kid!
