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How To Tell The DIfference

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What's the difference between a girl who spits and a girl who swallows?

A wedding ring.

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Very Much The Same

What do a condom & a coffin have in common?

You cum in one, go in the other & they both contain stiffs.

Don't Ask

My wife was curious. She asked: "When do married men stop jerking off?"

I told her: "When they get divorced."

And that's when the fight started...

Celebrate Good Times C'mon

Husband takes his wife to a disco. There’s a guy on the dance floor dancing like a king – moonwalking, break dancing, head spins, the works. The wife turns to her husband and sighs: "You see that guy? 25 years ago he asked me to marry him... but I said no."

Husband says: "Yep... and it looks like he’s still celebrating!!"

And that's when the fight started...