The Miracle Of Hanukkah

How does one explain the miracle of Hanukkah to todays generation?

Tell them that it's like if they charged their smartphone to last for 1 day, but it ended up lasting 8 days!

Why is the area between her breasts & hips called a waist?

You could easily fit another pair of tits there!

Two stock brokers are checking out a new secretary.

The first one says, "She's got nothing going on upstairs."

The second one says, "That wouldn't be the floor I'd be getting off on."

A guy, seeing two dogs going at it on the lawn says to his buddy, "You and your wife ever do it like that?"

"Only once" says his friend. "And it took 5 drinks to get her out in the yard."