Why did Santa get arrested?
He got caught laying Barbie under the Christmas tree!
Cop pulls a guy over at 3am: "Where you going at this hour?"
Guy says: "To a lecture on alcohol abuse, its effect on the human body. And the dangers of smoking & staying out late."
"Really? Who's giving that lecture at this time of night?"
"My wife."
What do you call a cheap circumcision?
A rip-off!
Why is a woman like the lunch special at Kentucky Fried Chicken?
By the time you’re finished with the breast and thighs, all you have left is the greasy box to put your bone in.
