Every Frickin' Joke
Bring Out The Tape Measure
- Category: Dick Jokes
- Hits: 2288
Why are dicks like fish?
You throw the small ones back, you keep the medium ones and you mount the big ones.
Who's Counting
- Category: And that's when the fight started...
- Hits: 1982
My wife was angry. She said: "It's unfair! A guy can screw a different girl every week and he's considered a stud. But if a girl screws even two guys in a year she's called a slut."
So I man-splained it to her: "Think of it this way. If a key opens lots of locks it's a master key. But if a lock is opened by lots of keys... well... it's a shitty lock."
And that's when the fight started...
Let Me Introduce You To
- Category: Dick Jokes
- Hits: 2194
What did one whore's knee say to the other?
Nothing... they never met.
Deductive Reasoning
- Category: Just Plain Funny
- Hits: 2429
Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson are camping. As they look up into the sky, Holmes asks, "Watson, tell me what you see."
Watson says, "I see millions of stars." Holmes then asks, "And what does that tell you?" Watson thinks for a minute then says, "Astronomically, it tells me there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Theologically, it tells me that God is great and that we are small and insignificant. Meteorologically, it tells me that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. What does it tell you?"
Holmes answers, "It tells me somebody stole our fucking tent."
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