Things Have Gone Too Far

What is more messed up than fingering your sister?

Pulling your finger out and finding your dad's wedding ring.

When do you know you've been married too long?

The only reason you go down on it is because it doesn't talk back.

Why do brides wear white?

The dishwasher should match the refrigerator and the stove.

What do a walrus and Tupperware have in common?

They both like a tight seal.