How do you stop a dog from humping your leg?
Pick him up and suck on his dick!
What doesn't belong in this list: Meat, Eggs, Wife, Blowjob?
Blowjob. You can beat your meat, eggs or your wife, but you can't beat a blowjob.
Why do brides wear white?
The dishwasher should match the refrigerator and the stove.
My wife and I were having our usual debate over which of two sexes... male or female... who's superior.
So I asked her: "Do you know the difference between Iron Man and Iron Woman?" She said, "What?"
I told her: "One's a superhero and the other is an instruction."
And that's when the fight started...
