Why does a bride smile as she walks down the aisle?
Because she knows she's given her last blowjob.
"Mom I tied the knot."
"Great. Now kick out the chair he's standing on & you're finally rid of the jerk."
How can you tell a tough lesbian bar?
Even the pool table has no balls.
Teenage daughter after a movie: "Had to change my seat 3 times."
Mom: "Did someone harass you?"
"Finally!"
