What do the aborigine call a boomerang that won't come back?
A stick.
The difference between buying a lottery ticket and fighting with your wife?
You have a chance at winning the lottery.
Why don't blind people skydive?
It scares the shit out of their dogs!
Gal to cashier: "I'm in a hurry, can you please check me out?"
Clerk looks her up & down: "Nice tits, babe!"
