What's the definition of eternity?
The time between when you cum and when she leaves.
Why does the bar association forbid lawyers & clients from having sex?
To prevent them from billing twice for essentially the same service.
Two rednecks are out fishing. The first one asks: "If I go to your house and fuck your wife and get her pregnant and she has a kid, would that make us kinfolk?"
The friend says: "Nope. That'd make us about even."
Girl finishes screwing a guy and says: "You said you're a dentist?" "Yes, I am." he proudly replied.
"You must be a great dentist." "Why do you say that?"
"I didn't feel a thing."