What do you get when you cross a computer with a prostitute?
A fucking know-it-all.
What's the first thing a man would do if there were no women left on earth?
Invent a dishwasher that would suck his dick.
My dick is so big, it graduated High School a year ahead of me.
My wife and I were discussing the differences between men and women. She asked: "So what do you think the biggest difference is?"
I told her: "What comes to mind when I say I'd like to give you a facial!"
And that's when the fight started...
