A Marine fighter pilot walks into a bar and takes a seat next to a very attractive woman. He gives her a quick glance then casually looks down at his new Apple Watch. The woman notices this and asks, "Is your date running late?" "No,” he replies, “I just got this state-of-the-art Apple Watch, and I was just testing it.”
Intrigued, the woman inquires, “A state-of-the-art watch? What’s so special about it?” The pilot says, “It uses alpha waves to talk to me telepathically.”
Now she's really interested, so she says, “What’s it telling you now?” "Well, it says you’re not wearing any panties.” The woman giggles and replies, “Well it must be broken because I am wearing panties!”
The fighter pilot looks down again, taps his watch a couple of times then smiles and says, “Darnn! This thing’s an hour fast.” And that, my friends...Is confidence!
Here we are in Sex Education Class. The teacher says, "All right, class, I want you to go home and come back tomorrow with as many positions as you can think of for having sex."
The next day she calls on Little Johnny in the back, "Well, John, how many positions did you come up with?" Little Johnny says, "Seventy-three."
The teacher says, "Oh, my goodness...uh...very good, John, very good..."
Next she calls on Becky in the front and says, "All right, Becky, how about you?" Becky says, "Gee, teacher, I only came up with one...where the guy just lays on top of the girl."
From the back Little Johnny yells out, "Seventy-four."