What does a virgin and a balloon have in common?
One prick and it's all over.
I told my pal: "I got a brand new digital hearing aid, $10,000!" "What kind is it?" he asked.
"Six-thirty."
Gal to salesman: "Should I buy a sweatshirt or a windbreaker?"
"Depends. You gonna sweat or break wind?"
I asked my wife what she'd do if I won the lottery. She told me she'd take half and leave me.
So I told her: "Great! I won 10 bucks on a scratch-off this morning. Here's your five, now get the fuck out."
And that's when the fight started...
