Three nuns and a priest are stranded in the desert. Luckily, they come across a camel. So they all jump on and head off to find help. After a while the camel is totally exhausted and falls down dead.
The priest says " Well sisters, this looks like the end. Do any of you have any last request?"
The first nun says "Father I have never had sex before." So the priest thinking this is their last day on earth, says OK and has sex with her.
The second nun says " I too father have never had sex before." So the priest thinks well, why not, and has sex with her too.
The priest then asked the third nun if her request is the same. She says "Not exactly father. I would just like to know what is that between your legs."
The priest says "Sister, that is a penis. It was put there by god to give the gift of life."
The last nun then responds "Great! Stick it in the camel and let's get the fuck out of here."
This couple gets married. After several weeks of marital bliss the guy wants to show his wife just how much she means to him. So he has "I Love You" tattooed on his dick.
One month later the wife files for divorce. When the guy asks why, she tells him: "You keep putting words in my mouth."
My wife was angry. She said: "It's unfair! A guy can screw a different girl every week and he's considered a stud. But if a girl screws even two guys in a year she's called a slut."
So I man-splained it to her: "Think of it this way. If a key opens lots of locks it's a master key. But if a lock is opened by lots of keys... well... it's a shitty lock."
