You know why men ask for a woman's hand in marriage?
Because they are tired of using their own.
The teacher asked Little Johnny, "Why is your cat at school today Johnny?"
Johnny replied crying, "Because I heard my daddy tell my mommy, 'I am going to eat that pussy once Johnny leaves for school!'"
How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?
Rename the email folder 'Instruction Manuals'
Did you hear about the constipated mathematician?
He worked it out with a pencil.
(uhhhh....Yeah, I have the same feeling you are having! :-O)
