Texan Nabbed For Lewd Encounter With A Fence

#WTF?! Seems a man can find love, albeit fleetingly, with a chain link fence. So many holes, so little time... 'til the cops show up! Texan Eliodoro Estala is facing an indecent exposure charge after a neighbor reported witnessing the naked 32-year-old “having sex with a fence” that separates their Austin properties. Not a neighbor you'd want to borrow a cup of sugar from!

According to an arrest affidavit^[1], Diana Vazquez first spotted Estala urinating on the fence around 11:25 AM Wednesday. When Estala realized that the Vazquez was recording him with her cell phone, he allegedly “took off his clothes.” After disrobing, Estala “put his mouth inside the chain link fence and stuck his tongue out moving it up and down.” Vazquez, the affidavit noted, said that it appeared Estala “was demonstrating a sexual act of ‘eating out the fence’ (Cunnilingus).”^[2]

But wait... there's more... Estala then allegedly proceeded to “stick his erected penis into the chain link fence” and then began to “have sex with the fence.” Vazquez, who remarked that Estala apparently “thought the fence was a female,”^[3] showed police photos and videos of Estala getting intimate with the inanimate object. Case closed.

As first reported by the Austin American-Statesman^[4], Estala, who appeared intoxicated (ya think?), denied copulating with the fence, claiming he had been inside his apartment the whole time.

Vazquez, however, identified him as the Hispanic male “having sex with her fence.” The crime scene is pictured above.

Estala (left) was collared on a misdemeanor indecent exposure charge and booked into the county jail. He was later released on a personal recognizance bond. No word on whether he tried to give the bars on his cell a turn...

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