A laugh a day. It's not hard. Seriously.

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And that's when the fight started...

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I'm just sayin... that's all.

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My wife smiled at breakfast this morning and said: "Today is our anniversary darling... what should we do?"

I told her: "Stand in silence for 2 minutes."

And that;s when the fight started...

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A wife woke up in the middle of the night to find her husband missing from bed. She got out of bed and checked around the house, and heard sobbing from the basement. After turning on the light and descending the stairs, she found her husband curled up into a little ball, sobbing. "Honey, what's wrong?" she asked, worried about what could hurt him so much. "Remember, 20 years ago, I got you pregnant? And your father threatened me to marry you or to go to jail?" "Yes, of course," she replied.

"Well, I would have been released tonight."

And that's when the fight started...

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The family was having dinner last night when our son turned to his mother and asked: "Mom, what's a blowjob"

I turned to him and said: "Your mother doesn't know son."

And that's when the fight started...

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Don't Miss These Jokes!

Really Paid Off!

A guy goes into a bank for a business loan.

The bank manager says, "What kind of business do you want to start?"

The guy says, "I have some black powder. You sprinkle it on pussy and it makes it taste like a peach."

The bank manager says, "I'm afraid we're not interested."

A few months later the guy walks into the bank pushing a wheel barrel full of money.

The bank manager says, "I see that idea for black powder really paid off."

The guy says, "Nah, that didn't go anywhere. I made my money with this white powder."

The bank manager says, "What does it do?"

The guy says, "Give me a peach and I'll show you."

Some Fun In The Sun

Shirley was sitting on a beach in Florida, trying to strike up a conversation with the attractive guy reading his book on the blanket next to her.

"Hi" she said. "Do you like movies?" "Yes, I do," he responded, then returned to his book.

Shirley persisted, "Do you like gardening?" The man looked up again. "Yes, I do," he said politely before returning to his reading.

Undaunted, Shirley asked, "Do you like pussycats?"

With that, the man dropped his book and pounced on Shirley, pulled her bottoms off, and proceeded to pound her right there on the beach. As the cloud of sand began to settle, Shirley dragged herself upright and panted, "Wow... how did you know that was what I wanted?"

The guy thought a bit and replied, "How did you know my name was Katz?"

Get A Little Culture

I took my wife to the art gallery. The 1st picture was a naked women with a small patch of leaves over her private parts. My wife didn't like it so she said: "Let's keep going."

When I didn't follow right away she turned and asked: "What are you waiting for?"

I told her: "Autumn."

And that's when the fight started...