The Happiest Man In The World

My wife and I were lying in bed last night. She gently leaned over and whispered: "I'm going to make you the happiest man in the world."

So I leaned over and whispered back: "I'm going to miss you."

And that's when the fight started...

I saw my wife bought one of those new Wonder Bras.

Goofing around I told her: "You know why they call it the Wonder Bra? When you take it off you wonder where your tits went."

And that's when the fight started...

How can you tell if a chick is too fat to screw?

You pull her pants down and her ass is still in 'em.

The teacher asked the class: "What's the capital of Wisconsin?"

The blonde raised her hand and answered: "W"