What happened to the depressed dyslexic?
He threw himself behind the bus.
The angry wife met her husband at the door. There was alcohol on his breath and lipstick on his collar. "I assume," she snarled, "that there is a very good reason for you to come waltzing in here at five o'clock in the morning?"
"There is," he replied. "Breakfast."
And that's when the fight started...
What did the guy say to his dick when he saw the girl he was about to fuck had genital warts?
"Hang on, boy! It's gonna be a bumpy ride!"
A female officer arrests a drunk. She warns him: "Anything you say can and will be held against you."
So he shouts back: "Tits"
