We were at the couples pregnancy preparation class. The instructor was teaching the women how to breathe & was telling the men how to give the necessary support to their partners at this stage of the pregnancy.
She said, "Ladies, remember that exercise is good for you. Walking is especially beneficial. It strengthens the pelvic muscles and will make delivery that much easier. Just make several stops and stay on a soft surface like grass or a path."
Then she turned to the men in the room, "Gentlemen, remember, you're in this together. It wouldn't hurt you to go walking with her." The room suddenly got very quiet as the men absorbed this information.
Wanting to get into the swing of things I quickly raised my hand and asked the instructor, "Would be all right if she carries a golf bag while we walk ?"
A guy visits the psychiatrist and tells him: "Doc, I need help, I think I'm turning into a dog. Every morning when I wake up I scratch behind my ear, like I'm looking for fleas. Then in the afternoon I run around in circles, like I'm chasing my tail. By the evening I lay down and lick my balls, just because I can. Doc, this has got to stop."
The doctor looks at him and asks: "Do you want to stop now?" The guy says: "Yes, yes"
So the doctor rolls up a magazine, swats the guy on the ass and yells: "Get off the couch!"