How is a push-up bra like a bag of chips?
As soon as you open it, you realize it’s half empty.
Why don't blind people skydive?
It scares the shit out of their dogs!
What did the guy say to his dick when he saw the girl he was about to fuck had genital warts?
"Hang on, boy! It's gonna be a bumpy ride!"
What do 9 out of 10 people consider to be a good time?
A gang bang.
