Two old folks were flirting at a senior's singles mingle. After a few drinks, the old man asks the old woman, "If I took you out for a romantic night of wining, dining and dancing, what would you wear?"
The old woman replied shyly, "Depends... ."
"Depends on what?" he asked. "On my ass -- where else?!"
I have the worst luck when it comes to scoring with chicks. Last night I got this cute little number back to my place and made my move with, "So you want to have sex?"
She said, "Well, I don't normally do this... but I think I'm gonna pass."