Go Both Ways

Old Dick is ambidextrous. Yep! I can swing a bat from both sides of the plate, & jerk off with both hands.

Wife gets naked and asks hubby, "What turns you on more, my pretty face or my sexy body?"

Hubby looks her up and down and replies, "Your sense of humor!"

And that's when the fight started...

Where does a one-legged waitress work?

IHOP

What's her name?

Ilene

A lady goes golfing and gets hit in the ass really hard with a golf ball. She goes to the doctor.

The doctor says, "Where were you hit?" She says, "Between the first and the second hole."

He says, "That doesn't leave alot of room for a band-aid, does it?"